two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
