he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
