Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
