Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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