Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
