It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
