I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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