everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize