Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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