I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize