I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize