I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
