BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
