i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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