Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
