Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I feel like abortions should bother me more
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
