All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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