this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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