she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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