you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
