i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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