it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize