Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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