Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
time to smoke my breakfast
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
