I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
false alarm, still single
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
