So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
