May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
