You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
only you would photoshop your dick
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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