so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
