I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Alive.
So much puke
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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