So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
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We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
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I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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