he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize