garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
