I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
