haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
