she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
