did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
