So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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