Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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