is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Drunk is not a location!
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
