he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
