We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
This is my gift to your gina
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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