is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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