I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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