I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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