will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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