you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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