I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize