I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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