You can't motorboat a personality
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
