Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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